Nintendo Switch Looks Like Optimus Prime and the Wii U Had a Lovechild

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By William Hicks | 11:19 am, October 20, 2016

Nintendo announce their brand new console this morning and I have no idea what the hell I’m looking at.

Previously called the Nintendo NX, the Switch appears to be some kind of transforming mechanical monstrosity born from the bowels of Japan.

The snappy new trailer reveals the Switch is made of like 10 plus pieces or so, able to be taken apart and transformed into a sleek handheld tablet, much less clunky than the Wii U. Simply by removing the innards of the Switch from its shell it will automatically disconnect from the TV into portable mode.

Nunchaku controller pucks can be pealed off the tablet that you can play in conjunction or toss one to a friend while riding through the Mojave desert playing Mario Kart. 

Hell you can even play it on poorly lit basketball courts under an overpass with the local corner boys as the trailer seems to encourage. And there are also normal controllers, if you’re not a quirky, live-every-day-like-its-your-last type of person.

If there is one take away from the Nintendo Switch, it’s that the console is best enjoyed with young sexy friends in major metropolitan areas who will invite you to their roof top block parties to play Legends of Zelda. For those of us with less young sexy friends, mileage may vary.

Any actual details about the console like launch titles, system specs, and price won’t be revealed until March.

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