Saudi royalty knows how to party.
President Trump’s first stop on his world tour is in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia where he hopes to convince Saudi leaders to more forcefully aid the United States in fighting Islamic extremists in the region. Rather than bore one another with questions on policy and military strategy, members of the Trump administration and the Saudi royal family decided to do what eccentric rich men do best: dance around with freakin’ swords.
Everybody knows that the Millennial generation is full of sissy, androgynous snowflakes who completely lost any sort of connection to traditional male masculinity. Thankfully, Saudi Arabia has yet been infected with the kind of cultural Marxism that frowns upon massive dance parties with various men chanting while waving swords around. As you can see, Secretary of Commerce Wilbur Ross and Secretary of State Rex Tillerson hoped to restore these lost values by demonstrating to the folks back in the states that Real Men can properly handle a scimitar.
The ceremony included other members of the Trump administration, including the president and the First Lady. Although they weren’t given the honor of holding any weapons, they still enjoyed a perfectly natural, not awkward jig with Saudi officials.
please enjoy this footage of the secretaries of commerce and state dancing awkwardly while holding swords pic.twitter.com/KrkoGRS8fW
— David Mack (@davidmackau) May 20, 2017
Reflecting his cosmopolitan upbringing, President Trump instinctively entered the flow of the dance. His performance demonstrated that Trump is not only a man of the American people, but a man of all people.
Of course, not everyone can be an expert at Sword Diplomacy. While Trump, Tillerson, and Ross were impressing the Arab world with their gyrations, Steve Bannon and Reince Priebus were standing around like nerds without prom dates.
Thankfully, Trump didn’t let the contrived Russia conspiracies bog down his important diplomatic work. Never have I been more confident in his ability to make some deals and solve the various crisis in the Middle East.