Justin Trudeau, the hunktastic, man-handling prime minister of Canada, is out of control and must be stopped. Seriously, the United States needs to build a wall along our Northern border until we can figure out what’s going on.
Trudeau had a busy week. First, a terrified Canadian family stumbled upon a shirtless Trudeau hiding in cave demanding selfies.
'Wow, that's crazy.' Shirtless Canada PM emerges from cave, takes selfie w/ a family on hike https://t.co/sb0tGSyK1f pic.twitter.com/BnMhltELVZ
— David Beard (@dabeard) August 4, 2016
Over the weekend, Trudeau crashed a terrified couple’s beach wedding wearing half a wetsuit and smiling like a maniac. Wow!
Justin Trudeau photobombed a wedding shirtless because he can’t be stopped https://t.co/jm9kSoI9Ms pic.twitter.com/gAbW9CREFe
— BuzzFeed (@BuzzFeed) August 7, 2016
Trudeau isn’t always so cuddly, though. In May, the prime minister and professionally trained boxer elbowed a female colleague during a skirmish on the floor of Canada’s parliament.
The Prime Minister has been accused of "manhandling" a MP in the House of Commons. https://t.co/qrU0zYH9LZ #cdnpolihttps://t.co/qwaDHQPAK8
— The National (@CBCTheNational) May 19, 2016
Canadian politicians were aghast at Trudeau’s brutality.
I have never seen a display of bully behaviour by a Canadian politician let alone a Prime Minister as I witnessed just now in the Chamber.
— David Sweet (@DavidSweetMP) May 18, 2016
Trudeau was forced to apologize, Canadianly, for the “unadvisable…course of action [that] resulted in physical contact.”
The man-handling episode in parliament was a stark departure from the reputation Trudeau has sought to create for himself — as a doting public servant who magically appears to carry handicapped citizens down broken escalators.
At Jarry metro today with @JustinTrudeau – a broken escalator makes it hard for some to get to their metro #cdnpoli pic.twitter.com/J0OSXbpTZb
— Adam Scotti (@AdamScotti) April 16, 2014
The American media is positively smitten with the Canadian tundra hunk who won’t shut up about being a feminist.
Op-Ed: "If Anyone Wins This Election, I'm Moving To Canada To Be With @JustinTrudeau" https://t.co/KeuGSftENC pic.twitter.com/UVMB8AWHoY
— Funny Or Die (@funnyordie) May 12, 2016
This is understandable, when you think about it. After years of promoting a president (Barack Obama) who is relatively young and seems like he might be kind of athletic, even if he isn’t in reality, the U.S. media is stuck with Grandma Hillary in 2016.
Pretending to be excited about having another Clinton in the White House can be pretty exhausting, so the nation turns its lonely eyes to the North, pining for a glimpse of Trud’ bod.
But hiding in caves half-naked, crashing wedding in a wet suit? That’s not the behavior of a stable individual. Someone needs to put an end to Justin Trudeau’s manic tyranny, and soon, before someone (else) gets hurt.
justin trudeau had a LOT of fun at pride https://t.co/9EcvHaWn0v pic.twitter.com/zxtQEyLpTr
— Anna Silman (@annaesilman) July 5, 2016
