New York Times Laments Discovery of Fire (Not A Parody)

Humans discovering fire might have been the single most important development in the history of our species. But was it really worth it? The New York Times is on the case:

“When early humans discovered how to build fires, life became much easier in many regards,” writes Steph Yin for the Times. “But there were downsides, too. Occasionally, the smoke burned their eyes and seared their lungs…”

The Times also examines the “negative cultural consequences” of fire, such as smoking and climate change. Fire might have even contributed to the “rise of the patriarchy” by letting our male ancestors go out hunting while the women stayed by the fire to cook, a dynamic that “spawned gender norms that still exist today.”

This, needless to say, is super problematic.

SMDH, fire.