This Candle Smells Just Like Canada’s Hunk PM Justin Trudeau

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By Andrew Stiles | 8:50 am, November 29, 2016

Fans of Justin Trudeau — the “woke bae” prime minister of Canada (a country best known for bordering America) — will now be able to fill their homes with his sweet, hunky musk.

The e-commerce website Etsy is selling a “Justin Trudeau-Scented Candle” for less than $20. For a limited time, buyers will also receive a complimentary temporary tattoo of Trudeau’s exquisitely boyish face. “Justin” time for the holiday season!


You might be wondering: What, exactly, does Justin Trudeau smell like? Well, according to the product description:

The Justin Trudeau-Scented Candle blends the rich scent of chai tea (because he drinks tea) with maple (because Canada). The resulting aroma screams “hot Canadian guy” (or, perhaps, “hot guy from Vermont”).

The candle — advertised as “a great gift for anyone who is attracted to men, or Canadians, or both” — comes in a 16 oz. tin container, which includes a lid that also features an image of Trudeau’s penetrating visage.

The tin container includes the following description for how to optimize one’s enjoyment of the “Justin Trudeau-Scented Candle” experience:

Close your eyes and touch the side of this candle. Do you feel how firm and rigid it is? That’s how Justin Trudeau feels. If you were caressing Justin Trudeau right now, at first hesitantly, but then with increasing urgency, it would feel a lot like this.

Trudeau has become a beloved figure among American liberals who have grown tired of pretending to be excited about Hillary Clinton and all the other old, boring Democratic politicians.

In addition to being a trained boxer and a self-described “feminist,” Trudeau has achieved notoriety for his quirky antics, which include photobombing a beach wedding in a wetsuit, and shirtless spelunking.

Trudeau is no stranger to controversy, however. The prime minister was widely mocked in recent days for showering Fidel Castro with praise following the Cuban dictator’s death. Earlier this year, Trudeau was condemned for violently elbowing a female colleague in the chest while storming across the floor of parliament. Not very feminist, eh?