We’ve all listened to a friend start to complain about a boyfriend or girlfriend whose, greatness they couldn’t shut up about six months earlier. You even warned your friend that this person they were so high on was actually, in all likelihood, the antichrist and they were simply in the swooning stage before they could see it.
All of this is where we currently sit with Ann Coulter and her apparent cooling on Donald Trump.
“I’m not very happy with what has happened so far,” Coulter told the Daily Caller. “I guess we have to try to push him to keep his promises. But this isn’t North Korea, and if he doesn’t keep his promises, I’m out. This is why we voted for him. I think everyone who voted for him knew his personality was grotesque, it was the issues.”
“My fingers are still crossed. It’s not like I’m out yet, but boy, things don’t look good,” Coulter said.
The urge to tell your friend, “I told you so” becomes almost overwhelming. But this is the part of the conversation where you comfort your friend and explain to them, honey, he’s never going to change. You attempt to console them by reminding them how great they were before that asshole came into their life.
The moment Coulter crossed over from brave right-wing intellectual to all-too-obvious shock author isn’t clear. But the heartbroken, smitten, fearless friend we used to love—the one who could argue constitutional law regarding Bill Clinton with William Buckley on Firing Line—has to be buried in there somewhere. “There is still good within you. The emperor hasn’t driven it from you fully.”
Coulter was smitten with Trump’s zeal for a good media fight and because he was a master negotiator—much like a girl falls for a guy because he’s good on the football field and tells her he’s an entrepreneur. Coulter was swept away by Trump’s promise to build a great border wall and negotiate the swamp monsters right out from a place they’ve made themselves comfortable with over the past 60 years. Coulter sang Trump’s praises all over cable television and also cranked out a book about Trump’s amazingness, “In Trump We Trust: E Pluribus Awesome.”
But Coulter is discovering Trump’s persona of master negotiator is largely fictitious, built on the shoulders of a 35-year-old book ghostwritten by someone else. Beyond simply telling us how great he is, there’s not much there to track.
“Where is the great negotiation? Where is the bull in the china shop we wanted? That budget the Republicans pushed through was like a practical joke… Did we win anything? And this is the great negotiator?” Coulter wondered aloud.
You can’t blame your friend for falling head over heals for someone who is a walking persona of everything they’ve written about in their books. Nor can you be too hard on them when they feel conned.
What Coulter still has going for her is her power and influence that didn’t rely on Trump, it simply became absorbed by him. Trump is only temporary, but Coulterism will live on. He is product of her, not the other way around. Like weening someone off any abusive relationship, the goal is to remind that person how strong they were before Cheetolips came along.
She is the original happy troll, speaking on hostile college campuses long before the trend of flashy Internet flamingos in search of a fame lure caught on. She has been the bellwether of which direction conservative media is going to tilt. Other shock jocks and freedom authors who were simply friend-zoned followed suit to please her. Coulter inspired a generation of young conservative women in media and politics, and it wasn’t because of her reliance on one dynamic TV personality. It’s never too late to turn away from the light, Carol Ann.
Ann ended her interview with: “I’ll let him speak for himself, but I think all of the Trump true believers are petrified.” Your friends being right about that crappy boyfriend should be the least of your worries—they’ll still be there for you. It’s the part where he ties you up and leaves you for dead in the trunk of his car that should be the real worry. And like a good friend, we’re here for you anytime you want to talk or send us more silent signals for help.