If Donald Trump wants to “Make America Great Again,” one easy place to start is with the entertainment at the Republican National Convention.
According to early rumors about the speaking schedule, the Trump campaign has a full list of “winners” they’re inviting to take the convention stage, but most of their top picks would work better for an episode of I Love the 80s than national network prime time. Among them, “Iron Mike” Tyson, former Indiana basketball coach Bobby Knight, Chicago Bears legend Mike Ditka, and Brian France, the head of NASCAR.
The Trump campaign won’t confirm the details, but does say that Tyson, at least, will not be slated for a speaking role. They don’t appear to have ruled out a Tyson appearance—after all, Trump loves Mike Tyson, even if a convicted sex offender is an odd addition to an official Republican event.
If you’re looking for entertainment, third parties are sponsoring some RNC musical acts, but they’re just as nostalgic for the Wall Street-and-big hair era as the convention guests. Journey will be headlining the four-day event, which will feature special performances by Brett Michaels of Poison, Rick Springfield and what’s left of the Beach Boys.
Coachella, it is not. Even perennial patriotic favorite Lee Greenwood and Republican stalwart Ted Nugent have, reportedly, declined to appear.
The DNC, on the other hand, has been slow to leak details of its entertainment schedule, but has confirmed that their event in Philadelphia will feature off-site performances by Lady Gaga and Lenny Kravitz. The closest the DNC will come to 1990s nostalgia is a set by DJ Jazzy Jeff, the lesser hip-hop artist from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.
The DNC is, of course, expecting a crowd of around 25,000 at the concert, titled “Camden Rising.” Tickets will be made available after the VIPs and delegates reserve theirs. If you’re desperate to snag a seat for Rick Springfield, you can catch him for free at a number of state fairs across the country.
