Media Blood Lust: Re-Casting ‘All the President’s Men’ for the Trump Era

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By Tom Teodorczuk | 5:31 pm, May 22, 2017

Hollywood is obsessed with both remakes and with trying to stay relevant. So it’s a mystery that while we have seen underwhelming remakes of 1970s movies CarrieAssault on Precinct 13 and Get Carter, there hasn’t been a modern take on All the President’s Men, Alan J. Pakula’s 1976 Oscar-winning movie about how Washington Post journalists Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein contributed to President Richard Nixon’s downfall.

Given the vociferous intensity of the reporting on President’s Trump’s alleged ties to Russia, and the media’s desperate hunger for a return to Woodward and Bernstein era Watergate glory, an All the President’s Men remake needs to happen now.

Therefore to save time and money on a casting director, Heat Street has cast the remake of All the President’s Men:

DAVID FAHRENTHOLD

Who are today’s equivalent of Woodward and Bernstein? Step forward Washington Post anti-Trump investigative journalist David Fahrenthold and national political reporter Robert Costa.

Fahrenthold should be played by Christophe Mintz-Plasse who rose to fame playing Fogell, better known as ‘McLovin” in Superbad. The resemblance between Pulitzer-Prize winning Fahrenthold and Mint-Plasse is uncanny, although the comedic actor would need to understand that Fahrenthold takes himself very seriously.

ROBERT COSTA

In addition to his political reporting for the Washington Post Costa already has caught the showbiz bug, having taken over as host of PBS’ liberal Washington Week, as well as being a paid political analyst for left-wing MSNBC. Yet any designs that he should play himself should be resisted.

Instead veteran funnyman Zach Galifianakis could step into Costa’s shoes (as long as he shaved his beard).

MICHAEL SCHMIDT

Michael Schmidt, the New York Times reporter who most recently broke the story that fired FBI Director James Comey claimed in a memo to have been asked by President Trump to end the Mike Flynn investigation, should be in the movie. Another actor from Superbad should play him: Dave Franco, younger brother of staunchly liberal James.

MARTY BARON

The late Jason Robards stole every scene he was in All the President’s Men playing former Washington Post editor Ben Bradlee. His counterpart at the Post today is grandstanding Marty Baron who has already been played by Liev Schreiber in Oscar-winning movie Spotlight that chronicled the Boston Globe‘s investigation into child sex abuse by Roman Catholic priests. According to those who know the editor, Schreiber’s sober take on Baron didn’t capture his sneaky side. Gary Oldman would have no problem conveying that side of his persona- he’s played Dracula, Mason Verger and Marley’s ghost — he can take on the Marty Baron challenge.

 MAGGIE HABERMAN 

We could see Schmidt’s colleague Maggie Haberman- perhaps Trump’s most favorite New York Times journalist- being played by Anna Silk (Bo from TV’s Lost Girl).

DEAN BAQUET

As for her boss, the supremely self-important Times editor Dean Baquet, we need someone who can be very, very serious. He’s played Thurgood Marshall, he’s played Othello and he’s played Morpheus. Now Laurence Fishburne can again wax poetic, and scold the unbelievers. It’s the perfect role for him.

SHIA LABEOUF AS DEEP THROAT

As for the role of the Trump-era Deep Throat in All the President’s Men,  the source who lives in the shadows would need to erupt with volcanic rage at the state of the country as he leaked classified info to the MSM. Only one actor can do this: Shia LaBeouf.

Just on the basis of that title alone, All the President’s Men would be called out by social justice warriors unless it didn’t feature high-profile Trump media female antagonists. So how about:

 KATY TUR 

Oscar-winner Brie Larson is a dead ringer for showboating MSNBC host Katy Tur- author of an upcoming book about her time covering Trump- if she can find Room in her schedule. Moreover Tur probably looks upon Trump in a similar vein to how Larson regarded Casey Affleck during the most recent award season.

RACHEL MADDOW

For the potentially tricky casting of MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow, we will ignore the unkind online chatter that reckons she should be immortalized onscreen by a man and instead suggest British actress Tamsin Greig who was in Showtime’s Episodes alongside Matthew Perry.

KEITH OLBERMANN AND DAN RATHER

Rather like Gregory Peck and Robert Mitchum appearing in Martin Scorsese’s 1991 re-telling of Cape Fear, the stars of the original movie should both have cameo roles in the All the President’s Men remake.

Hoffman could play Keith Olbermann the acerbic former MSNBC gasbag now — having been fired from most of the country’s major media companies — fighting the resistance for GQ.  Sure Olbermann is 6″4 and Hoffman is 5″6 and there’s a twenty-year age gap between the two, making them far from being separated at birth. But since when has Olbermann himself ever inhabited any state approximating reality?

Who should portray disgraced anchorman Dan Rather who still problematically pops up to deliver pious sermons on media ethics in the Trump era? Step forward Robert Redford.

Some might point out Redford has already played Rather in the 2015 political drama Truth. But nobody saw that.

And everyone would go see the All the President’s Men remake.. wouldn’t they?

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