Late Sunday afternoon, model Amber Rose tweeted out a photo of herself wearing nothing but a black bikini top, sunglasses and an immaculately tended lady garden—because an extended amount of time had passed since she’d last commanded attention.
The Internet had mixed feelings on Amber Rose’s waxer’s handiwork (fair warning, the picture is not suitable for work, small children, large children, and impressionable pets). But political commentator Piers Morgan was especially miffed at Amber’s muff, and took to Twitter to explain precisely how Ms. Rose was setting back feminism.
Putting aside that Morgan repeatedly retweeted Rose’s undercarriage to his millions of followers, the man has a point.
Despite Rose’s claims that she was pushing the cause of feminism forward by pushing the guidelines of feminine hygiene backward, there’s nothing especially “feminist” about going bottomless on social media. If there were, the millions of porn bots that populate Twitter’s network would be hailed as the harbingers of a woman-centric age.
Sensing an opportunity to extend the fame that had come with the photo, Rose quickly addressed Morgan’s apparently “misogyny” by launching into a Tweetstorm about the philosophical underpinnings of sex-positive feminism.
No, just kidding, she insisted she wasn’t uncomfortably nude, called Morgan an idiot, and praised herself for her sexual confidence.
She also posted a photo of Maroon 5 frontman Adam Levine mostly naked. Morgan responded with his own photoshopped semi-nude photo, to which Rose responded that at least her bottomless photo was promoting something—the annual LA SlutWalk—an event whose agenda does not appear anywhere near Rose’s charming photo, in what is clearly a marketing oversight.
The good news for social media is that Morgan extended the feud into Monday, still insisting that Rose was seeking attention, and still Tweeting out that photo of her hanging out without pants on.
Eventually, the two started discussing what would happen if Rose starred in pornography—a bizarrely speculative discussion considering that such material is already available.
The fight ended in a draw, with Morgan unwilling to believe Rose was at all interested in making a feminist statement, and Rose unwilling to admit that going without underwear is, at the very least, an effective marketing strategy for short term projects.
Fortunately for everyone, the two—neither of whom have appeared on television in the United States for quite some time—say they’re working to find a way to hash out their differences live on air.