For social justice warriors, who lack any real religion, gender neutral bathrooms are the closest thing they have to a church. Thus, this sacred safe space must not be tarnished in any way, especially by cis male scum.
And thanks to Everyday Feminism, men like me have a handy guide to “checking our privilege” when entering the hallowed ground of a gender neutral bathroom.
The cis male writer begins the piece by detailing a point of shame in his disgusting oppressive peeing habits, when his roommate called him out on the smell of his urine.
There is a whole array of not so pleasant smells that come from the bathroom, but in this case she was talking about pee. My pee. She had pointed out to me that there was evidence of it all around the toilet. Pee that stayed there so long that it began to smell.
This was the larger takeaway from that generative conversation. It sparked reflection about my behavior in the bathroom. I had to check my own privilege and think about the impact I was having.
In order to check his privilege, the author goes to extensive lengths to not allow his shared apartment bathroom to be another bastion of the patriarchy. He goes into graphic detail about how your aim or lack thereof harms women and gender minorities.
There is that little extra left. That excess fluid that’s still in there. That you want to make sure is all gone so you vigorously shake all over the place, not realizing that in the process, droplets end up on the floor, the toilet seat, and who knows where else.
The likelihood is that you don’t even notice where the excess of your pee has landed – that no one has ever pointed it out to you.
You are a cis man. And to some degree (especially if you are a white cis man), society promotes an idea that we are entitled to absolute freedom of movement. You deserve, among so many other things, to pee freely and have no one tell you about the consequences of your poor aim.
Honestly, the article has so many great tips, it’s hard to briefly summarize, but here’s some of the greatest hits. Why not try them all to prove how woke you are?
- “Try sitting down. This is a fun suggestion. Seriously try it. You just might like it. Sitting doesn’t make you effeminate (and if it did, what’s wrong with that?)”
- “Another option is you can do a mini-squat and hover above the toilet to get any excess pee into the toilet bowl. It’s actually great exercise and good for your hamstring muscles.”
- “Don’t contribute to the unfair and deeply misogynist standard that men shouldn’t have to worry about hygiene or about how clean they are.”
- “Don’t make folks feel unsafe or trapped by hitting on folks, following them in and out of the bathroom, or asking folks lots of personal questions.”
Men’s rogue pee droplets in bathrooms is a massively important issue gripping the nation that obviously creates REAL WORLD HARM. And dare I say it’s probably the number one reason Donald Trump was elected president of the United States.
While this was incredibly useful article, there are still some problematic elements the author negelected. First of all, the author assumes the reader’s gender and assumes that only cis males pee on the seats. What about the trans women who pee on seats? Where is their voice? And why is this author gendering genitals? It’s 2016, I thought we were past that.