If you’re still hung up on what to get your partner for Valentine’s Day, you should know that time is running out and you should absolutely panic about the state of your relationship.
Fortunately for you, though, Burger King, home of the Whopper, has a solution you can pick up on your way home from work: an “adult meal” that comes complete with a meal for two (two of their signature sandwiches, two orders of fries, two beers), and a sex toy so you and your partner can get all Fifty Shades of Grey after you’ve finished stuffing your face.
The box includes either a satin eye mask, a feather tickler, or a scalp massager.
Unfortunately for Americans, Burger King’s Adults Meal is available only in Israel. But as with many of the chain’s creative ideas, a US rollout is probably not far behind.
But fear not, Valentine’s procrastinator. Other fast food and fast casual chains may still have you covered.
Midwester burger joint, White Castle, allows customers to make reservations for a “romantic evening” at their restaurants between 4pm and 9pm Wednesday night. Servers will lay out a red tablecloth and flowers for you, and provide tableside service to couples looking to canoodle over a Crave Case or some chicken wings (most locations are already booked up, so move quickly).
In some states, McDonald’s offers a candelight dinner service, dishing up Big Macs between silk rose centerpieces and heart-emblazoned (non-disposable!) drinkware.
In the south, Waffle House is offering a “romantic dinner package” with a “craft-tailored” menu for couples and families, and some locations will even feature a strolling violinist, setting the mood for your “breakfast-dinner.”
Hooters is catering more to the singles crowd, with a “Shred-Your-Ex” promotion that will get you 10 free wings if you bring in the broken pieces of your heart (and your ex’s shredded photo). Couples can get the “gourmet wing package for two” which includes 20 of their world famous wings in any sauce, and a bottle of Dom Perignon to share. Price varies by location, but hovers around $250.